1.
Listen: Listening is the first
step to understanding. It is important to allow your partner feel like you can see them. Many a relationship has been
wrecked because all one does is to
hear-hear anger, resentment-but failing to see fear and anxiety. Hence it
is important to listen with your eyes-pay attention to their words and look at
the import of their statements.
2.
Adapt: This will enable you to adapt accordingly. How?
When you start to pay attention to your partner through listening, you are able
to respond to the problem. And this
in essence is the power of adaptation-for instance maybe you both are going
through a period of intense transition, when you listen to each other, you can grow together through the process rather
than growing apart. The important step is to move forward together.
3.
Communicate: This is why
communication is extremely important. it is the oxygen to any
relationship-without communication you cannot survive. You need communication
to be able to survive and thrive in your relationship and consistently move
forward-because if you fail to grow together, your relationship will die as a
result because of lack of communication.
4.
Implement: Practice what you preach. Instead of persisting in your criticism
of your partner’s actions, start to inhabit the qualities that enable you to
respond in love. For instance, do
they have a problem with cleanliness, encourage in love by commending their
efforts instead of challenging their weak spots.
5.
Observe: I cannot emphasize enough the importance of
observing your partner carefully. You will learn a lot about a person through
how they speak, and what they do-actions always speak louder than words. Actions
tell the truth-and this will be important in understanding your partner because
you want to see a visual map that enables
you to direct them accordingly. And actions show this path to their
emotional, physical or even psychological uncertainties.
6. Encourage spending time with one another: And this is why it is advisable to spend time together. This is more quality over quantity. It is important that your partner feels attended to-rather than feeling absent in your presence. If you feel absent-then you are not spending time together-you are actually building a bridge to be apart.
Q: What have been the challenges you have had in spending time with your partner?
Tip: Everyday find something encouraging to say to your partner, slowly you will notice a change because you have shifted the atmosphere surrounding your environment of your relationship-you have cleared the air for positivity to breathe and negativity to suffocate.